Renewed Joy in the Lord: An Update

Dear Sister,

Every season of life will bring the temptation to doubt and wonder how God will work and move in your life to somehow bring about his plan. As I shared with you in my last post, sometimes I struggle to trust God with his timing to grow me. Yet, he promises to complete the work that he has begun in each one of his children (Philippians 1:6). After all, his will is to grow us in Christ-likeness for his glory and our good.

Day to day, however, it is difficult to remember the big picture of God's loving plan to grow us in his wise and careful discipline. In the moment of trial, no matter how big or small, it is hard to not be so overwhelmed with the frustration and inconvenience to rejoice that the Lord will lovingly use each situation for our good and growth in Him.

I have been in a season that I have seen little growth and purpose coming from various difficult situations.  Yet, God has been so kind to give me little glimpses of his work on me and through me. Even this summer, while serving in Croatia in various ministries, I have often been discouraged that perhaps my time here has been wasted and that I will never see good results from my days here. I have been burdened by personal sin as well as just feeling dry and empty. In these last couple of months though God has been so kind and gracious to continue to show me how He has grown me.

Psalm 42:1-8

As a deer pants for flowing streams,

so pants my soul for you, O God.

My soul thirsts for God,

for the living God.

When shall I come and appear before God?

My tears have been my food

day and night,

while they say to me all the day long,

“Where is your God?”

These things I remember,

as I pour out my soul:

how I would go with the throng

and lead them in procession to the house of God

with glad shouts and songs of praise,

a multitude keeping festival.

Why are you cast down, O my soul,

and why are you in turmoil within me?

Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,

my salvation 6 and my God.

My soul is cast down within me;

therefore I remember you

from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,

from Mount Mizar.

 Deep calls to deep

at the roar of your waterfalls;

all your breakers and your waves

have gone over me.

By day the Lord commands his steadfast love,

and at night his song is with me,

a prayer to the God of my life.

This past week, I participated in a camp hosted by several like-minded Baptist churches in Croatia. Each year they preach through one book of the Bible through evening sermons and morning small groups, and this year they just so happened to be studying through Philippians.

For the past two years, Paul's letter to the Philippians has been an encouragement to me to fight for the joy and the contentment found in Christ alone in every circumstance. I have read this epistle countless times and have even committed chapters to memory.  Still, I am learning from the depths of this small portion of God's bountiful Word.

When I first arrived, I felt defeated, weak, and so very alone. I was the only native English speaker there at the time (two other Americans and an Irish family would come later for a few days). Yet again, God had given me the opportunity to experience weakness in a new way. This time, I was feeling my vulnerability and dependence on God to persevere as a lone single girl among a sea of people communicating in a language I still struggle to engage in. It had been more than two months since arriving in Croatia, and now here I was alone without the missionary family I had grown to love (the girls had already traveled to the States for a brief furlough) and without many of my English speaking Croatian friends (they would arrive a few days later).  Here I was living life with mostly unfamiliar people speaking rapid Croatian camping in a tent on an island off the coast of a foreign country... Basically, the perfect recipe for isolation and homesickness to settle in.

As the days went on, I began to feel less homesick, settled in to the routine of the camp, and welcomed the company of  familiar friends... but it was the messages and the Croatian brothers and sisters around me that led to the greatest joy. Faithful pastors preached and lived out the message of true joy taught in Philippians.

Surrounding me were so many examples of joy that can only be found in the Lord.I met a gypsy girl who was ridiculed by her community for accepting Jesus, but is so full of joy in the Lord that she can't help but sing praise songs wherever she goes. I heard the story of a pastor's faithful brother who lost his wife suddenly to cancer, but still sang praises with joy knowing his wife and mother of their two children is resting safely with the Lord. I saw a dear friend cry tears of joy as she began to realize anew the surpassing worth and undeserved blessing of knowing Christ though she still battles daily against a crippling muscular disease. God also blessed me with several conversations that I know would not have been so rich and encouraging had I not been learning and growing these past two years, as I studied Philippians and walked through the daily struggles of life.

God used this past week to open my eyes to see not only how God has fulfilled his promise to use the comfort I have found in Him to comfort others, but also how God has been working to grow me through the daily fight for joy in him. Somehow, the experience this past week even open my eyes to see this whole summer and the past two years in a different light. Now I see more clearly that I am not the same girl who I used to be. God has changed me and will continue to chisel away at me, even if in the moment I can't recognize the outcome of all the pain and broken pieces of my life coming together and shaping me for my good.

To see in so many ways that God has indeed changed and grown me over the past 6 years of Christian life and even in these past 3 months has been such a refreshing blessing. God is renewing the joy of my salvation, and I am seeing anew that I cannot rest on shaky feelings and my own perspective of what God is doing in my life. In the moment, you rarely see how God is at work, but maybe two years down the line He will show you God is working even now to shape you more into the image of Christ through the daily struggles of life. So if you are struggling for joy and contentment wherever God has you, if you are tempted to believe that maybe God has left you or that you are too much a of a mess for God to change you, keep striving toward the Lord and seeking to follow him faithfully. Engage your fears and failures with the truth of the Gospel. There is joy to be found.

Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;

my flesh also dwells secure.

 For you will not abandon my soul to Sheol,

or let your holy one see corruption.

You make known to me the path of life;

in your presence there is fullness of joy;

at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Psalm 16:9-11

With love,

Michaela

Com·mu·ni·ca·tion

                Recently, you could say communication has been on the brain. It has been the topic of conversation amongst friends and especially pre-marital counseling! Biblical communication is vital, not only because what we say and how we say it play a crucial role in our relationships, but because God designed us and expects us to communicate in a way that pleases Him. Reading books about effective communication between individuals has made me realize what a long road I have to work on this, especially in preparing for marriage. The Lord has been so gracious thus far with me in this area of communication! I read a quote recently saying that, “10% of marital strife is due to disagreement and the other 90% is due to tone of voice.”

….reading this makes me cringe. BIG time! How convicted I am when I think about the things I say sometimes in a distasteful tone (or sarcastic tone!). How many arguments and hurt feelings I could have avoided if I had spoken in a loving way by putting others before myself as the Lords commands.

 

“Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”

Philippians 2.3

Considering the fact that God could have chosen a multitude of ways for us to communicate with Him and each other, He chose our primary way of communicating to be the use of words! How important they are to Him and so how much more important they should be to me! I’ve realized just how, in our sin, we abuse communication for our own glory. Sometimes we “undertalk” by avoiding conversations with others because we are fearful, selfish, tired, too busy, or the topic (we feel) puts us in a place of inferiority…aka pride! Or we “overtalk” by means of gossip, nagging, taking over a conversation, being defensive, and well…the list could go on! In all of these areas we must constantly bring our minds back to the Truth about what God says about our words.

  “With his mouth the godless man destroys his neighbor . . .”

Proverbs 11.9

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

Proverbs 15.1
 

“A soothing tongue is a tree of life, but perversion in it crushes the spirit.”

Proverbs 15.4

“Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”

Proverbs 16.24

 

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue.”

Proverbs 18.21

 

 

Some people seem to be better communicators than others. While that may be true to some degree, we all must realize that communication is a learned behavior and requires growth just like every other area in our Christian lives. It takes work to communicate in a God honoring way! Sometimes I struggle with communicating the wrong things (or what I should not be communicating). On the other hand, I also struggle with failing to communicate the right things (or things that I should be communicating)….verbally (my words and tone) as well as non-verbally (my actions).  I’m so thankful that the Lord didn’t just leave us to figure it out on our own. He gave us His Word to live by; to realize that Biblical communication begins with a commitment to speaking the truth and allowing God’s Word to impact not only what a person communicates, but how a person communicates.

 

This topic of communication has encouraged me greatly to pursue and practice it Biblically!

 

In Christ,

Tiffany

 

 

 

 

 

           

 

           

Dreaming Smaller

When I was younger, I knew I was destined for something important. I was going to revolutionize whatever youth group I was in. I was going to leave the country for years at a time to preach the gospel to people whose language I didn’t speak (but I would surely be fluent in by the time I got home). I was going to be the next C. S. Lewis, and I have the Narnia fan fiction to prove it. My life was going to be exciting. It was going to be flashy.

Obviously, my life did not go in that direction.

So far, while writing this, I’ve had to put my son down for a nap (always a battle), feed him when he woke up, put him in his bouncer so he’d get some exercise, start the dishes, start the laundry, get my screaming son back out of the bouncer, console him and his hurting teeth (teething is not fun. Poor dude), set up a safe area for him to play on the floor, and separate him and the cat several dozen times. And that’s just in the last few hours.

What I’m saying is this: I’m not great at time management. I’m not a wonderful housekeeper or cook or laundry maid. I need to take extra time to complete these tasks and complete them well.  I wasn’t good at these things before I got married. I didn’t get much better at these things before my son was born. My progress has been slow and never steady. However, this Is my ministry. Right now, in this place in life, I need to be a good steward of my home, try and help David in any way I can, and spend time with Anderson, teaching him about the Lord as well as how to sit up without support or incorporate consonants into his gurgling. It’s not a flashy ministry, and I need to learn to be ok with that.  

I’m learning to be content. My ministry is small and simple, and centered around one 6 month old most days, but it’s where I am at right now. The Lord has given me exactly as much as I can handle. I’ve known people who have participated in the sort of ministry opportunities I dreamed of as a teenager, but they did them well and they did not seek the approval of man like I would have in their situation. I, right now, can’t handle anything flashy. It would make me more prideful. It would fuel my need to be noticed and admired by other people. It wouldn’t be good for me. The simplicity of my life is a gracious gift.

And, on those days when I wonder if my ministry even qualifies as that, I am reminded of Timothy’s mother. She is briefly mentioned in 2 Timothy 1:5:

“I am mindful of the sincere faith within you, which first dwelt in your grandmother Lois, and your mother Eunice, and I am sure that it is in you as well.”

Paul celebrates the legacy of Timothy’s mother. Timothy’s father was Greek. He probably didn’t know the Scriptures. It was up to Timothy’s mother and grandmother to teach him about the Lord, and the Lord used their ministry to bring Timothy to a saving faith. Timothy did great things for the Lord.

So, that’s where my greatest achievement might be. It might be one of my kids (no pressure). Or a sibling. Or one of a million other tiny things I don’t have the eternal perspective to understand. I doubt Lois or Eunice understood what the Lord was using them for fully in their lifetimes either, but they were faithful with what little the Lord had given them, and so must I be.